Saturday, January 12, 2013

That Little Devil

I recognized him immediately in the form of self-pity and laziness.  It's funny how he can show up, isn't it?

He had tried to convince me that I could not handle visiting the Blessed Sacrament, Our Lord, once a week. I mean home school was starting again and I would just be way too busy.

I had loved the new Adoration hours that had been set up for the Advent and Christmas season.  Hopped right on board.  I had the perfect day, (Friday), and the perfect time (11 - noon).

It was amazing to sit with Our Lord, especially during such a holy season.  It was the spiritual anchor I needed!

On top of that, I had been desiring a day of Adoration for our parish, which in the past, only came one night a week for one hour.  I found that sad.

Of course, I jumped on the opportunity when the opportunity arose.  I would come out thinking how nice it would be if the parish would continue this throughout the year.  And then they did!

I was delighted to hear that they had decided to continue keeping Friday as a full day of Adoration.  Prayers answered.

That's when he messed with my head.

I found myself doubting that I could "give up" any more of my time.  The excuses started to pour into my brain...I was going to be busy enough with home schooling....the sports routine....working with the baby....overloading my schedule.  I even told the woman in charge that I probably won't be able to continue, and that I would phone her.

Seriously, it didn't take me long to realize who was messing with my head.  I never did phone the woman.  I just kept attending.

The older girls take turns attending with me.  They rotate so someone is at home babysitting.  (Yes, my ringer is off but I keep my phone in sight so they can text me in case of baby question or emergency only.)

Little man and Miss Clementine....I don't bother yet.  Selfish as it may sound, I need the time to spiritually refill.  Honestly, at the stage that they are in, discouragement on my behalf would be the only outcome if I attempted to bring them.  Some day though.

So now I come out of the Holy Hour asking myself...hmmm....what is that little devil going to do now to try and trip me up?  He never ceases.  And don't you find that the more you pray, the more he works so devilishly hard to make you fall?

Praise God! for the spiritual gifts of the Holy Spirit!!

~  Patty  ~

8 comments:

  1. He's a little dickens, isn't he? Of course he wants to rob us of our joy, peace, time with our Lord and of any spiritual graces we (and our families) need. It is so very easy to push aside spiritual practices that our souls need when life/family drains us. Good for you to be aware that it was a ploy to keep you away from HIM.
    Unfortunately, our parish doesn't have adoration. The parish we are twinned with, however, has it First Fridays and one evening a month. Last month I finally made the effort to make the 10 mile drive in the cold to go and attend in the evening. I took little Greta along and she was perfect (of course, she's not walking yet so that may only be a matter of time). We only stayed half hour and it happens that its on the same evening as my big kids' taekwondo. How is it that it's never occured to me before to drop big kids off and take one of the littles with me to pray?! I am planning on continuing this practice. I desire it and need it. Quiet time with our Lord is one of my favorite things.
    I pray that you are given some extra grace to fight against any other way that little devil may see fit to get at you now that you are commited to adoration.

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    1. Oh enjoy those moments!! I'll continue to pray for your endeavor and longing to be with Our Lord. God will provide!

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  2. Patty...you are such and inspiration to me at times when I need it most. Thank you for the push I needed, and in such an eloquent way! I am so very glad I began this blog journey and have "met" such faithful friends like you and Sarah too! : )

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    1. Ditto, Billy Jo on the meeting you and so many other amazing women. Isn't it truly wonderful that the blog world really can be used in such inspirational ways? I have found the gentle nudges that I had been in need of and I like to think they are God moments ;)

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  3. Amen. thanks for this reflection. we all need to hear this, and cling to the Holy Spirit!

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  4. It is sometimes hard to tell, isn't it, when we are being deceived or are making a rational decision to not add another thing to our plate? I'd say the fruit of this endeavor is proof of its being a good commitment. I love that you get that time also with one of your older children.

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    1. I love how you put it into words, Laurie....the fruit of this endeavor! Just a nod from God, through you, that it is a good commitment :)

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  5. Good for you, not giving up or giving in...No time is better spent on this earth! May the graces continue to pour forth into your domestic church:)

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